Why I Don’t Make New Year Resolutions

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Hi. My name is Claudia, and I’m someone who loves to start things.

 Yes, start something. 

Now you say: “Hi Claudia. Welcome.” 

 

I love the feeling of starting a new book, show, project, craft, life. However, I am the worst at finishing things, a.k.a. I’m a quitter. I have a pile of books I’ve only held in my hands for minutes, abandoned craft projects, paint cans that had a purpose, shows I’ve only managed for 15 minutes, and diets that I’ll never meet again.

And for this reason, I don’t make New Year Resolutions.

Knowing that I am asking myself to work towards something larger by making many small steps helps me reframe my thinking. I don’t need to set myself up for failure– and trust me; I will fail. Instead, I like to choose a vibe for my year. 

 At the end of 2020 and the beginning of 2021, I decided to lean more into being what I like to call a “fancy lady.” It means that I want to moisturize, use serums, wear deodorant, shower, and shave and wax regularly. I wanted to be one of those women who people smelled as she walked by and thought, “She smells nice.” I’m writing this in December and looking back, and I can say that I’m pretty proud of the commitment I gave this. I’m showering daily (this is a big deal for those of us with mental health issues), my eyebrows are tweezed and filled in with brow gel, and my skin is moisturized. I have all the makeup I need to throw myself together quickly if I need to. I got a haircut that made my hair easy to manage and style. Most days, I wake up and dress even if I have no plans to go anywhere that day. I drop my kids off at school in clothes that I deem appropriate and not embarrassing to them. Doing this act of kindness also gave me the confidence to tackle many other aspects of my life, but this was my focus. 

I urge you to rethink the way you think about new year resolutions. Instead of making a list of hard and fast resolutions, think about what you would like your life to feel like. 

What is one thing that bothers you regularly that you could set up a routine for? 
If your house is feeling a bit messy, what system could you set up to keep it tidier? 
If you’re looking to go back to work– what routines and systems are needed to make the entire family successful during the transition?

Start researching small steps that you can take to achieve the bigger goal. There are so many excellent resources out there, particularly for moms. Need to learn to meal plan, budget, establish a fitness routine, cleaning help, career advancement– it’s all out there! In your local mom group, a quick search on YouTube, Pinterest, TikTok, google will all lead you to amazing women ready to support you. 

Whispers: If you’re a quitter like me, please know that you are in good company, and you can sit with me. Of course, if you are someone who can set out a list of goals and stick to them, I salute you. You’re amazing! 

I haven’t exactly decided what my vibe will be for 2022. I think it may be the year to dress the body I have. Meaning I’m ready to wear cute clothes even though I’ll likely never reach the weight that the diet industry wants me to. I’m dressing this body in beautiful and comfortable clothes. Please don’t hold me to that, though, because I might change my mind. Please share what your goals are for the new year. There might be someone right here in our community who can help you achieve those goals.

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Claudia Mancilla
Claudia is a native Californian and a citizen of nowhere. She can usually be found hiding in the bathroom, strolling the aisles of a local thrift store, or watching TikTok videos in the parking lot of CVS and Walgreens looking for a great coupon deal. She's a former elementary school teacher with a passion for multicultural children's literature. She always has a snack in her purse and a Costco flat of cokes in her hall closet. She is the perfect addition to a community of moms that keeps it real, and straight forward; with her experience as a no sugar coating mama, she can guide and share her family motto is "Do whatever you want. Just be cool." Her kids seem to know what that means.

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