My long day started the night before when my 4-year-old decided he was going to wake up 4 times that night. Sleep deprivation often feels like the best friend of early motherhood. The day began as a blur. Before I knew it, it was the afternoon and time for pick up. Two schools to visit, and my plan was to run in and out. By this time, I was low on energy and patience. After picking up my second son, all three of us began to walk to the car. As usual, they began to plead, “Mom, can we go to the playground?” With my never-ending list, it’s always a negotiation in my mind. Today, however, though tired and feeling worn, I did something different. I decided to listen to the warm sun and the cool spring-like wind, though it was winter. Florida weather sings of early spring in mid-February. I was surprised that with all the busyness of the day, something within me craved stillness. I was given the opportunity to pause and simply watch them play. They dropped their bags at my feet, began to giggle as they recognized they had won this battle. Before I could pick up the dirty book bags and juice-stained lunch bags laying on the ground, they were off running. I heard the other kids laughing, smelled the damp mulch from this morning’s rain, the quiet noise of background chatter as parents gossiped amongst themselves. And for a brief moment in my very busy day, I paused and recognized that this moment is drifting by right before my eyes.
They will only be this young for so long…….
It’s actually not long at all. I told myself, one day you will miss this. You will miss the sounds of the playground, the chaos of children yelling, the load of lunch bags and water bottles, the smell of kids in the afternoon sun. The joy and giddiness in their laugh as they swing from monkey bar to monkey bar. There will be a day when all I will have are the memories.
So today, I want to remind you that it’s ok to just soak it in. Day by day, I am choosing to fully embrace all it means to be their mom and recognize the magic in the mundane. I’m encouraging you as I did myself to pause in the mess, pause in the overwhelm, pause when you feel tired, pause when you just cannot go on, and remind yourself that time is moving. Time is moving so it is important to be still. Be still and observe the sounds, the smells, the joy, and the pain that makes up this and each moment. The moment when you are their entire world.
